Monday's Mug 015
Hello, writers and friends welcome back to my Monday’s Mug. There are so many things in the last week that have been crazy, disappointing, and just strange. Staying home in some ways is lovely, but I miss seeing people. I am back to drinking tea again. I found this excellent spice shop about an hour from me. I believe it has closed now, but before it was, I was getting a fabulous green tea that was called Moroccan Mint. I am not an avid green tea drinker, but I love mint-flavored tea. I had drunk it almost daily, but my supplies are getting low, and with the virus, I am not sure how to get more right now.
How has your week been?
Are you going to a workplace or working from home?
Have you lost your job entirely because of this mess?
I am sorry for any of the situations above. It is not easy, and each one comes with its problems. I was lucky enough to get to work from home for this last week. It was a wonderful week, and I am genuinely grateful. I struggle with not being able to see people and leave my house. I live in an isolated area anyway, and I can’t even see my neighbors go outside, but I still long for human interaction. I want hugs.
This week I have picked up my pen more steadily to write out what is happening in my head, the fears I am having, and the disappointment. There was a surprise I had set up for my child’s birthday this next month, and the concert was postponed. I hadn’t told her yet, and I am glad I didn’t, but not being able to surprise her with something I know she wanted to do hurts. I had signed her up for sports this Spring as well, but they were postponed as well. I know in light of those who no longer have an income, these are silly things to be upset by, and I understand that.
When I haven’t been writing, I have been watching some Marvel movies to take my mind out of the current events. I turn them on late at night when I can’t turn off my mind. It has been hard for me to relax at home now that I work at home. I got outside as much as I can, and I would encourage you to do the same. It has helped keep me stay calmer as I continue this new journey.
I am going to sign off, for now, don’t forget just to write.
Monday's Mug 014
Welcome back to Monday’s Mug. There have been a lot of changes in the world since we last talked. I am snuggled up with a cup of tea tonight, and it is chilly outside. I hope you will join me and I will get you some tea as well. Would you like honey or milk?
January was such a productive month for me. I completed a contest and was writing nearly every single day. I wasn’t always writing creative fiction, but I was getting morning pages done. By the time I came into February, I felt like I was no longer making progress in my writing through the use of morning pages. My book had been lying dormant for a while now, and I wanted to start editing it finally. However, even though I was given many suggestions from my writing community, I still felt like I needed downtime.
In February every year, I help with a non-profit to put on a banquet for single mothers on Valentine’s Day. It was a busy month with family events going on as well. I found there were a lot of moments I was thinking about writing, but then nothing was ever done about it. There was a spiritual blog I used to run, but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to start committing to another blog at this point. I had many discussions with my trusted advisors about it.
I was excited about March it has always been a month I have to enjoy because I love flowers. Yes, I love them. I don’t plant as many flowers as I used to, but they are something that brightens my day. I love Spring. It is my second favorite season.
The writing, in March, was something else I was looking forward to. I was going to start writing on a new platform and publish daily. However, here I am a couple of weeks now into March, and I have been dealing with a lot of emotional family things. People are moving in and out of my life. My parents’ health hasn’t been greatest lately. In many ways, I have felt good, but dealing with these events has been difficult.
Then my world was suddenly turned upside down in a matter of days here. I am sure many of you can say the same. I left work on Wednesday, and by the time I returned, the places in our community started shutting down. Schools and events were canceled. It was shocking, and to be honest, it filled me with anxiety, which I finally had felt like I was getting a handle on this year.
I have realized that my writing helped deal with the start of the year, and I was able to vent to a blank page when I couldn’t get out of my head. Do you feel like that too? Kind of stuck in your head at times?
Let’s get some more tea, and enjoy the slowness of things now.
I have to say many good things are happening with this stay at home order. The pollution is down, and people are connecting. In my world, the company I work for allows us to work from home during this time. My house is cleaner than it has been in a while. I have lunch with my child every day. I have all my furry sidekicks by my side all day long. I am saving money on gas, and of course, I am not eating out. I am trying not to freak out, but there are moments in the day where I let the cabin fever get the better of me. I need to get back to the new normal.
My goals for this week are to breathe and just write.
Hang in there, writers.
Free Write - Moon Church
Welcome to Free Write Friday!
I will be adding an image every Friday to free write with.
It is a practice to allow your mind to wander creatively into new stories.
Set your timer for 10 minutes and write!
Have Fun!
Top 5 Ways I Avoid Writing
This last week I was doing a writing contest, and it got to the point where I had to make myself literally sit down to finish the piece. By finish the story, I mean out of my head and on the screen. I was nervous about doing my first contest and sending my work out there. What I promised myself this year is to be dauntless and keep moving in spite of fear.
So if you talk to me and I am doing these 5 things, it is likely I am avoiding a larger project. I have a book I have been working on as well, and my characters are getting impatient.
1. Deep cleaning everything.
Now you might think, how could this be procrastinating? Maybe you really do need to clean. There are days when cleaning is necessary, but this type of cleaning is taking one room at a time and deep cleaning. I will spend hours in one place that is not dirty, to begin with. No, this is a sure sign that I need to talk to someone about something. I am mulling things over in my mind too much, and the only way I can get started wrapping my head around writing is cleaning.
2. Watching a show, I have already seen it.
I’m not particularly eager to waste my time watching shows I have already seen unless it is Friends. So, if I am watching something I have already seen, then you know I might not want to focus on the writing assignment on hand.
3. All of a sudden, I need to go to the store.
Now we are not talking about milk and eggs run people. We are talking about any stationery or book store I can find. It is not about the essentials, but we are talking about needing a new pen because it is going to write so much better than the 100 other pens I have at home in the drawer.
4. Lost on the scroll of social media.
I like social media like everyone else, but if I am on Facebook for an entire night, there is something really wrong. So if you see me on Facebook all night, then know another work of art is on hold. It is only Facebook. I get lost on though it is like my comfort blanket because I have had it for so long. However, it is not helping me get my writing done. Okay, I might have a little bit of a Twitter problem as well.
5. I must replan everything in my life right now.
This was maybe less obvious to catch. I am a huge planner freak, and I love trying out new planners all the time. However, if I am trying a new planner, it is probably because I am trying to figure out how to get more time in the day to write a project I am avoiding. Oh, the irony of just using the time I am to plan to just write instead of thinking I can squeeze more hours out of my day.
When I am avoiding writing, I usually need hugs, help, and encouragement from people surrounding me. This is not about avoidance of everyday writing but often a more significant project I am trying to finish. I am a talker, and I need to talk about my problem or grief out of my head so I can get back to my project. Know you are not alone when you are putting off the big creative projects. Don’t forget when you are being productive there might someone else avoiding because they need to work through something. Send your quiet friends and encouraging words because they might really need it.
Monday's Mug 013
Welcome to another Monday’s Mug. There were a lot of things in my life happening this last week. I will be settling in with a nice hot cup of tea because I’m minimizing my coffee intake. Can I get something for you? The weather has been fickle around here with its up and down temperatures. It is raining in the morning and snowing at night. I felt I was a lot like the weather this last week in my productivity.
I few new things for 2020 I am doing are night pages every evening before bed on the 4thewords.com. If you don’t know about this website, it is for writers, and you can try it free for 30 days to see if you do like it. I get in some writing for the day, and some days I do prompts instead. I call mine night pages, and I know I am not going by the rules of Morning pages in The Artist Way, but writing my pages at night on a computer at this point is what works for me. I love the idea of doing a written journal, but I have yet to keep up with journals. 4thewords gives me incentives because I get to fight monsters and go on quests. It is not all about the game, though, and is more focused on writing than I expected. The way you defeat monsters is by writing I find this very fitting. Writing is the way I beat some of life’s monsters as well.
I had a terrible Monday my dog of 17 years died. She had been going downhill for a while, but she finally gave up Monday. She had been such a huge part of my life through some very dark times. She was my friend and sometimes the only “person” I talked to for long stretches of my life. This might seem strange to you, but I have to say that is one thing that living in the country has always provided for me is a vivid imagination. I have talked to animals my whole life because there were no neighbor kids to hang out with. We grew up on a dairy farm, and it takes a lot of work. There were no times when we were able to leave and take vacations. The cows needed us every day twice a day. It was fun, but I have to say that my imagination and stories were being created long before I ever knew how to write any of them down.
Would you like some more to drink?
Last week was also the first contest I have ever entered for writing. I was scared, no doubt, but after being with the Story A Day SuperStars for a couple years now, some of the fears I never thought I even had I’m realizing are fading away. I had submitted some of my work in the past, but nothing ever came of it. I was concerned at times with never being good enough. I was taking my world of writing way too seriously.
In this last year, especially when I have felt like I have been treading water. I have been moving forward with my ability to deal with criticism. The rejection was something that terrified me, but now I am looking forward to being rejected because at least I know I am no longer in my own way, and I doing it. I am fulfilling my dream of being a published writer. I know I will be accepted one day. I have been working on my craft and I am devoting time daily to my art.
I will talk a little more about the contest later this week, but in the middle of the contest, my family got sick. I had to be miss work a couple of days. I was trying to care for others while I was ill myself, and it was not good at all. It was a tough few days. So during that time, I wasn’t really focused on the short story contest at hand, and it was tough to get back into that frame of mind. I was happy my Story A Day group was there to support me, and one of them was doing the contest as well. We both really want to propel ourselves out into the writing world again.
I have to go for now but remember to just write.
Free Write - Couple's Highs
Photo by Denys Nevozhai on Unsplash
Welcome to Free Write Friday!
I will be adding an image every Friday to free write with.
It is a practice to allow your mind to wander creatively into new stories.
Set your timer for 10 minutes and write!
Have Fun!
Poetry - Alone
I don’t even know where I am going
As the car rocks me back and forth on
A highway I have driven in autopilot skitters by.
Black asphalt ahead like film off of its projector and twirling against gray hues in the sky.
Brown plants along the edges of the road resisted these changes to their wilderness and died while trying to rebel.
An emptiness encompasses me as tears begin to pool at the bottom of my chin before dripping in my lap.
Screams explode out of me into the silent car, and my throat instantly becomes sore.
My mind longing to be changed and heart missing all connections.
Finally, a car comes to change the scene as I wipe my eyes on my work shirt.
My eyes are wiped when my head hits the roof of my car, and my chest punched hard.
I cannot open my eyes now; only darkness is there.
Monday's Mug 012
Last week went by in a flash and before I knew it. I am sitting down to take a few moments to think about everything that happened last week. I have my cup of tea tonight. What can I get for you?
Last week was full of more goal planning for the month. I have been putting off reading a little bit lately, and I find myself longing for more community these last few days. It has been a long time since I have had some one on one time with any friends. I need to interact on Slack more as well with the Superstars. I need to stay on top of my reading goals for the year. I keep pushing off finishing some books, which is not like me because I usually want to do more in that department.
I will take a minute here and talk about the entertainment side of my life since last week; my reading has been minimal. I binge-watched Messiah on Netflix. I thought the show and acting were great. The writing was excellent. I didn't know what was going to happen next every time, which was nice because I usually can figure it out quickly. I will not give away anything here other than saying it was well written.
Are you watching anything? What is your favorite show?
I have started Marvelous Mrs. Maisel as well, but I am taking this one a little bit at a time. This show is funny, and the writing is a dream come true. You might think I say this about all of the shows I watch, but it is not the case. I have enjoyed finding a couple of new things to watch for pushing me into a unique atmosphere when it comes to the point of view, comedy, and plot twists.
I have been working on my writing more and have been staying consistent with a little over 400 words a day since Jan 1. I am proud of myself because I haven't taken a break so far and don't plan on it. I think I a lot of it has to do with using the 4thwords.com site to get myself a little more motivated on the not so motivated days. It has been hard for me in the past to stay consistent, but I noticed that when I did my language or another app that tracks every day you log in, I don't want to start back at day one again. It has been helping me get back into the flow of writing and to make progress on stories I have wanted to write.
I have joined the SWAP52 Club prompt /week challenge with Stop Writing Alone. This has been a great experience because I am getting to know more writers as well as new avenues for prompts. I have been consistent with writing a story each week, even though I am not sharing them right now.
I hope you all have had a great week and we will talk next Monday again. Until then, just write.
Free Write - Home Edge
Photo by Cindy Tang on Unsplash
Welcome to Free Write Friday!
I will be adding an image every Friday to free write with.
It is a practice to allow your mind to wander creatively into new stories.
Set your timer for 10 minutes and write!
Have Fun!
2020 Word of the Year
Have you chosen a word of the year yet? It is okay if you haven't last year I didn't get my word until around the 14th. This year I didn't know what my word was until this week. It changed a lot of the course of the last few days. It was hard to figure out because I have the expectations of what seems okay compared to what I really want to do. I had written a list of my goals for last year, and they are similar to what I wanted to accomplish last year. I did lose about three months to 2019 because of family illness. I wasn't able to launch my own blog until April and really struggled with the separation of my original blog into two different types of blogs. I was happy about the vision I had for the two separate blogs. These blogs seemed to be different sides of me. The new blog will come back in the Spring but no date at this point. It is very different; it taps more into my faith and into my passion for studying various aspects of religion.
I was trying to figure out what I had really happened last year. There were habits I was glad I had focused on like I read 20 books and was consistent for 70 days on my German lessons. However, there were other vital goals I was not accomplishing. I wanted to post on my new blog three times a week. I wanted to write at least one story a week without fail. However, I found 2019 another hard year for me figuring out how to cope with life changes. I was dealing with panic attacks and a level of anxiety I had never experienced in my life before. Sure I have been a worrier about this, but this year I was really isolated from people, and there were a lot of connections with friends that fell apart. I didn't have people to lean on this year, and when I did, I felt like I shouldn't be talking about things in my life because they were not significant or tragic. There are times, though, when all the little things start to pile up and feel like a lot. I didn't know how to handle it, but I know I lot of it was rooted in my lack of trust and my fear.
Some fears are rational, but this last year had too many irrational fears. One of my worries was refusing to trust people with my vulnerability. I am doubting my ability to recover another big emotional blow. I haven't left the 60-mile radius from my home because my car is older and needs work. I have not been writing, which is the thing I have loved for many years because I was afraid I wasn't good enough, and what is worse is what happened if I was good enough but holding myself back. I have been lost inside my head for weeks or months with all of these worries. For the last few months, I have been working on breaking free.
This year I chose the word dauntless. It came to me the other day. At first, I couldn't figure out why it was so important, except I realized all of the things from this last year of my life were not completed because I was full of fear. The idea is I know I will never be rid of fear I have, but I can move instead of allowing fear to keep me frozen in time. Dauntless came to be first through Veronica Roth and her Divergent series. I envied those in the Dauntless sect because they did seem so free. I was a time in my life when I allowed my mind to be open again to pursuing my dream of writing. I had to break through those fears, and yet I will use this word to break through my fears. I will rekindle old friendships and make new ones. I will participate in writing contest this year, and send stories out for publication.
Whatever your word, goal, or habit, maybe this year, when you mess up to give yourself the grace to forgive yourself and start over again.
Monday's Mug 011
Welcome back to my Monday Mug. There are so many things to catch up on, but I will hit the highlights of the last month.
Did you bring your favorite mug tonight? I have one I found again from unpacking. I love picking up mugs at craft fairs. This mug has a butt. It is one of my favorites because it is funny looking and makes me smile.
December was a crazy month for me. I am not sure about you. Aside from the business of the holidays, my car broke down, and my toilet stopped working. I have learned to appreciate indoor plumbing and the magnitude of how it can affect your day to day. I don’t want to go back to the alternatives for bathroom spots. My holidays were great I got a dancing llama toy from my mother because well I like llamas and she thought it would be hilarious. It is funny and who doesn’t need more laughter in life anyway.
It has been warm here this year. It is odd to have a Christmas season in shorts in Missouri, but this year it happened. I think with more temperate weather, it was nice to get out in nature more and go on walks with my family of dogs. Everyone around here was really enjoying the warm weather, but it made Christmas seem like just one more day on the calendar.
I have continued writing in December, but it has primarily been journaling and things of a personal nature. I totally bombed NaNoWriMo this last year, which was new for me because I had been improving over the previous few years. I think it came down to my planning. I really wanted to start a historical fiction book. Still, I was not prepared for the magnitude of writing in that genre when I haven’t previously. I am usually a dystopia or sci-fi girl.
I am going to get more tea, would you like some?
Things have been strange this year. I have dealt with panic attacks this year and various other conditions I have never had to deal with before. However, I am finally feeling like I am getting back to a better place. It might just be because the toilet is fixed or maybe just the spark of the new decade, but I feel like I can breathe again.
Within these just a few passing days of the New Year, I am excited to start new habits again. My German review is still going strong. I am happy now to take on just a little more of the things I really want to do this year.
I am overflowing with goals and ideas for the year to come, but it is getting late. I promised myself to go to bed at a decent hour because I wake up early, even though it isn’t fun for me yet.
So give me some advice about what is something I could do to make my mornings more fun?
The Gratitude Experiment
When you take time off from anything, make sure you are using that time to dig deep in your soul about things you might have been putting off. One of my focuses on my time off was my mindset. This year I have been trying to understand mindset because there have been so many mentally taxing this year. In fact, most of the people I have been talking to have said this year has been mentally crazy and exhausting. I guess it could be said about every year, but it is not valid.
So, I finally broke down and read the Power of Positive Thinking and watched many YouTube videos about positive thoughts, gratitude, and inspiration. I fed my mind with these positive things because, in my struggle, I am running out of the alternatives.
You know when you are so sick you decide to try something because you are like what could it hurt? It is where I was within reason, of course, and sat there thinking over a week what could it hurt to try positive thinking and gratitude?
Now I am a skeptic and very analytical when it comes to adding new things in my life. While researching positive thinking, there were a lot of ways people had mentioned to go about becoming more positive. Some of the suggestions were getting rid of toxic people, getting rid of clutter, and spending more time on self-care. When I looked at these particular items, I thought positive thinking wasn’t going to work. How could I avoid toxic people they are everywhere? I’ve been unpacking my life box by box for years now after a move I have clutter all over until I can sort through things. I love the idea of self-care, and of course, I would love to spend more time on it, but I am a single parent, so I only get so many minutes in that department. Was I making excuses, of course, I was because I wanted it to be comfortable and not make my life harder. I am a baby steps kind of person.
Upon further research into the positive thinking world, I found people using affirmations, vision boards, and gratitude lists. These were things I felt like I could make time for and experiment with. I needed to make this accessible anywhere because there were many times when I wasn’t home and need a way to pick myself up. I decided to go with the Trello app. I have used the free version of Trello to track my writing, so using it for something else essential to be well being seemed to fit. Trello could be accessed from any device or through the website.
The Experiment.
1. Find some affirmations that would apply.
It was easy to find some affirmations online; there are lists of them everywhere. I found a couple pictures that had lists of affirmations I knew applied to things I needed to change my mind about. I copied these pictures and added them to a happy board I created. Writing has been important to me for many years, so I also found just two of my favorite writing quotes and one inspirational quote to keep me motivated.
2. Gratitude list
I created a board in Trello to list three things I was grateful for in the morning, which was a great way to keep myself off social media in the early morning hours. These could be simple things or complex ideas. Some days I was thankful for AC, and other days I was grateful for the galaxy.
3. Victories List
I decided to create a list for victories of the day that I have seen used in particular planners. I had been struggling with feeling like I have been making progress in my goals, so at night, I would list three things as my victories. This was anything from I had a customer thank me for my dedication, I got to go to bed early, or I had a good talk with my kiddo about school.
4. Vision Board
My vision board was just a few pictures of how I would like to see my life in the next few years. Images were representing relationships, my living situation, joy, and a variety of other ideas.
I did all of these things for a solid month, and my positivity was through the roof. I had the energy to lift others up who were having a bad day. I was not nearly upset with the circumstances of my life. It was unusual how much changed and how my point of view really shifted.
I stopped to see if it would make a difference, and let me tell you it did. Within a couple weeks of stopping, I wasn’t right back where I started, but I could feel the pressure and anxiety begin to build again. So if you are having a hard time writing like I was or just dealing with the personal things going on in your life, give gratitude a chance and see what it can do for you.
*This is not meant to take the place of medical advice. If you are having mental health problems, please seek help. If you are having suicidal thoughts, please contact the suicide hotline at call 1-800-273-8255.